I had a dream that aliens had made contact with the Earth. They were big and green, and had tentacles.
It was decided that, as a diplomatic measure, we would have to marry their princess to one of the princes on Earth. That would be me. I’m okay with that. I was born and raised as a diplomat, so it’s in my bones.
So we’re at the wedding ceremony and we’re waiting for the bride to show up. Many people are gathered to watch this historic ceremony.
Suddenly, one of them pulls out a gun and starts waving it around. He’s clearly an unstable guy. He’s talking about how this is just a trick so that the aliens can take over. How could we be so stupid? We have to stop this immediately.
Everybody is very worried about the diplomatic implications of doing anything at this point, so not even the body guards are doing anything. I decide that I’ll have to talk him down. Since he’s acting like an unstable guy rather than a committed rebel, I think I might be able to talk him into putting down his gun.
I approach him calmly. He sees that I’m the prince and that I’m listening to him. I start to speak calmly with him and talk him into putting down his gun. I pick it up.
At this point, he pulls out another gun and points it at me. Fortunately, I was quick on the draw and had my gun pointing at him too. From here, I convinced him that we should both put down our guns. We did this. I picked his up, causing him to pull out another gun. Dang, how many does he have in there?
By about the fifth time this happened, I saw his agitation growing greatly, so I was scared that he was reaching the breaking point. This time, when he pulled out his gun, I didn’t think there would be any reasoning with him, so I shot.
The bullet was absorbed by him, and he started to laugh. I shot again, because I was startled and agitated. Again, no effect.
He kept on laughing, and then changed form. Apparently, the aliens are shape-shifters, and this was the bride’s idea of a joke. The king and queen of the aliens started laughing too. I could tell that the bride thought this would just be some minor silly diversion, and then we’d get back to the wedding ceremony. The king and queen were thinking, hey, come on, quit screwing around. This is important.
Boy did they misjudge human humor!
Before this, we did not know that the aliens were shapeshifters. Now, they all had the thought in their heads that this whole diplomacy thing was a trick to take over, and we knew that anybody they saw could possibly be an alien.
A huge riot erupted. Everybody beating each other up. And it didn’t settle down, either. All over the world, people adopted this policy: If you see someone shooting anyone, it’s probably an alien shooting a human. Let’s shoot them.
Of course, if you shoot that person who was shooting, then you yourself become someone who is shooting, so people will try to shoot you.
Unbeknownst to the humans, the aliens had all left the planet in fear, and this was just all humans shooting each other.
How did I know this? Because the bride remained on Earth and we had fallen in love after all. She usually walked around in the form of a human (Katie Gorman). We were in touch with her family, orbiting above the Earth. Their plan was to wait out this absurdity and then try to make peaceful contact again.